DISCLAIMER: I’m going to say it right up front. I’m not a doctor. I’m not a nutritionist, I’m not an expert on food (except eating it), and I’m not telling you what is right or wrong. I’m so screwed up when it comes to food so please take everything I say with a grain of salt (pun intended)…unless of course, it’s God’s word then you can trust it with your entire being! _____________________________________________________
I am 5’10” which is tall for a woman, and I’ve always been XXL. I felt a lot of pressure to be petite and skinny in this crazy old world. I’m learning that God knit me together to be tall and large framed and I never ever will be petite and skinny. I still struggle with God over that. Self-acceptance is hard, especially with the pressure in this society to conform, and magazine and television diet ads are all over the place.
My first experience with dieting was as a teenager. During one summer break, I started to cut everything I was eating in half and the weight came off. I had lost over 25 pounds and my waist was 30″. I was feeling very proud and confident of myself. I went to the Doctor for some unrelated health issues, and as he was examining me he said, “You’d be a pretty girl if you’d just lose some weight.” (Did you glimpse the lieing forked tongue of the enemy?) Keep in mind this Doctor obviously had issues with fat women because he had pictures of them on his walls walking naked through grocery store aisles.
Needless to say, I was crushed. His words that day brought death to something inside me and I quit trying. I just gave up.
When I was 17 this same doctor (don’t ask me why my Mom took me back to this quack) put me on thyroid pills (because there must be something wrong with you that you’re
fat overweight.) I was eating 800 calories a day. A few days after that, during class, I became very ill and had to call my family to come get me. That was the last time I “dieted.”
I lived most of my life suppressing all of this, and the issues I have with food, until Jesus revealed Himself to me. I am slowly learning to trust Jesus with this, but when I first believed, I suffered plaguing crippling guilt over the food I ate. I thought that, having believed, I should be able to just stop using food for comfort and replace it with God’s word. It didn’t work like that for me. I think it is because I have so much to learn, and God is patient. He gave me John 3 and it confronted me with “everyone who does evil hates the light, and will not come into the light for fear that his deeds will be exposed.” I applied this verse to my “hidden” food issues realizing I couldn’t hide it anymore.
The Lord is drawing me out into the light. I’m learning that using food for comfort is idolatry. I so desire Jesus to be my comfort, but I really struggle with this. It is a stronghold in my life that God is sloooowly releasing me from. I don’t understand everything, but as needed, He shows me little things.
Like recently, I read some teaching by a great man of the faith who showed me that the only real and lasting way out of addictive behavior is Jesus. This man of faith wrote that in all of our sins and vices we are to daily, in contrition, come to the Lord and confess our sin, pray, and seek His forgiveness and absolution. Oh, how freeing it is to come out into the light every single day knowing Christ paid the penalty for all of my sin, and just confess the idolatry of using food for comfort! For the longest time I couldn’t even admit it to myself that it was sin.
But people who do what is true come to the light so that the things they do for God may be clearly seen. John 3:21
Since Christ has suffered physically, take the same attitude that he had. (A person who has suffered physically no longer sins.) That way you won’t be guided by sinful human desires as you live the rest of your lives on earth. Instead, you will be guided by what God wants you to do. You spent enough time in the past doing what unbelievers like to do. You were promiscuous, had sinful desires, got drunk, went to wild parties, and took part in the forbidden worship of
food false gods. Unbelievers insult you now because they are surprised that you no longer join them in the same excesses of wild living. They will give an account to the one who is ready to judge the living and the dead. After all, the Good News was told to people like that, although they are now dead. It was told to them so that they could be judged like humans in their earthly lives and live like God in their spiritual lives. The end of everything is near. Therefore, practice self-control… 1 Peter 4:1-7
As I search read, and inwardly digest God’s word, I also confess, pray, believe, and practice self-control and healthy living habits. I also keep this promise in mind: “Then you will know the truth, and the truth will set you free.” John 8:32
If you suffer and or struggle with food
sins issues or any other pet or addictive sin, I want to tell you what my good and Godly friend always says to me, “You are precious and honored in His sight. You are beautiful.”
Father, thank you that you call me precious, honored and beautiful no matter what the world calls me. Set me free from food idolatry. In Jesus name, Amen.