I wrote a blog the other day and mentioned that wives are their husband’s helpers. My hubby and I were discussing that further this morning. He is really trying hard to get a handle on our finances, and a counselor suggested he track our expenditures down to the penny for the next 2 months. I know how hard it would be for me to do that and I’m organized. My husband is not organized so I immediately felt apprehension, but at the same time I knew this was going to be something he needed to do for his own financial organization. I’ve been tracking his progress as any good wife should do, and I’ve noticed that he doesn’t always write expenses down as soon as he walks in the door. I happened to mention that to him. Guess what his immediate response was? Yep, anger.
I stopped to think about why he reacted in anger, and then this is what came out of my mouth with a quiet gentleness that surprised me, “You get angry because you are prideful. You are believing the lie that when I try to help you, you see it as your never measuring up to my expectations which is not true. God gave me to you as a helper which implies what? You WILL need help. Your wife can easily see where it is that you need help. God makes sure of it. The enemy wants you to think otherwise. Instead of immediately reacting in anger when I try to help you (which is really struggling with God for giving you a helper) try to tell yourself the truth. “My wife is my helper. She recognizes a need, not because she is critical or because she thinks you lack anything or because she’s never satisfied, but simply because by her own experience with failure she has learned what is needed. God has prepared my wife in advance for the role of helper and she is just fulfilling that role.”
It takes humility for husbands to admit that they need help, that they (Adam) need the rib that God took out of them to form their “Eve” with. Think of the alternative – if they never admit that they need help then they, in essence, are calling God a liar because he himself gave them a wife as a “helper.”
Another benefit of recognizing the need for help is it will soften a wife’s hearts, and what husband doesn’t want a wife with tenderness.
It’s really a win win situation once a man agrees with God that he needs help. It’s not a weakness as it appears on the surface, but really a strength underneath. How powerful are the helpless in God’s realm!
…he (Jesus) told me (Paul): “My kindness is all you need. My power is strongest when you are weak.” So I will brag even more about my weaknesses in order that Christ’s power will live in me. Therefore, I accept weakness…It’s clear that when I’m weak, I’m strong.” Excerpts taken from 2 Cor 12.
Father God, thank you that when we obey you all goes right. Help us wives be the helper you made us to be, but at the same tame keep us humbly submissive to our husbands and keep them submissive to us. Mutual submission brings about a greater glory to you, Lord. Enable us in our marriages to walk according to your will. In Jesus name, Amen.
If anyone has any further insight on this please share.