While reading a book yesterday I was swamped with this feeling of homesickness. It started in my throat and spread out into my shoulders and down into the pit of my stomach. I felt nauseous and lonesome and hungry (but not for food) all at the same time. It came out of nowhere. I wasn’t thinking about anything in particular. It just kind of snuck up on me.
I remember having a similar feeling when I went away to camp as a young girl. About the second day in I got hit with a wave of homesickness that made me lie on my bed and cry. When I did get home I was so glad to be there, but at the same time no one was there to meet me. I felt kind of disappointed and empty inside. No one had missed me.
I believe when I get home this time things will be much different…
We know that if the life we live here on earth is ever taken down like a tent, we still have a building from God. It is an eternal house in heaven that isn’t made by human hands. In our present tent-like existence we sigh, since we long to put on the house we will have in heaven. After we have put it on, we won’t be naked. While we are in this tent, we sigh. We feel distressed because we don’t want to take off the tent, but we do want to put on the eternal house. Then [eternal] life will put an end to our mortal existence. God has prepared us for this and has given us his Spirit to guarantee it. So we are always confident. We know that as long as we are living in these bodies, we are living away from the Lord. Indeed, our lives are guided by faith, not by sight. We are confident and prefer to live away from this body and to live with the Lord.
Jesus, I can’t wait until I’m finally home, no longer this cursed world to roam. I long to see you face to face. I long to see the man who died in my place. I long to be in my Father’s arms, away from pain, tears and harm. Amen.